Proto Poem

Grade bedazzles money
soul sell I remember
youth given choice
obey and obsess

range between multiplier
takings over exploited
magnitude assesses balance
suicide needs promise

Torn

My hands shake continuously
My tears running down my cheeks
It’s all unstoppable
I don’t know why for which reason
I’m feeling so empty tonight

Open and wide wounds are there
Bleeding, painfully striking, it’s all so clear
What is it that’s so painful
With every wound I feel
Seems times a million

Why so empty
What have I done to feel this way
So strong, so steady I was
Still the inner demon in me called my name
Breathing, uneasy, how death is so appealing

I cry now knowing what I’d been thinking
Knees shaking, hands clamped
A heart stabbed and torn in pieces
And a soul shared by many
Take me now, Lord, because I’m all gone…

11.10pm March 17, 2007

Suicide

God forgive me for what I’ve been thinking
A blade in sight is so appealing
I cry now, losing all of me
Not knowing how much I left for free

Keep me now, keep me unfolded
Help me, because it’s what I’ve dreaded
So tempting, a crime indeed
The devil awaiting, my soul’s in bid

Strengthen me now
My faith’s all gone
Love’s such a tired word
I’m losing all my fighting sword

Eyes swollen, tears run dry
Heavy breathing, I don’t know why
Pain, emptiness and loneliness I feel so deep
A cliff I see, so good, yet steep…

12.10am March 18, 2007